Racism in the waiting room

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Really starting this thread is my way of venting and encouraging others to not tolerate or allow racist and/or other offensive behaviour in their practice setting.

A patient today was sitting in the waiting room and talking to the receptionist in the podiatry practice I work in. He commented how much he liked a certain English magazine. He continued to say that it was very traditional english magazine and he was glad not to see a black face anywhere. With this comment he stopped to laugh as did the receptionist.

I was taken aback and shocked particularly as; there was another patient in the waiting room, he had also just seen me go into the open staff room and that I am of indian origin.

I find the undertones of his comment incrediably racist. In fact this comment has made me upset all day... till now!

I felt I had no right to confront either patient or receptionist as they could be considered to be in a conversation which I was not in but I am now determined to confront any such comments coming from patients/staff if they do have a racist undertone (as they unfortunately do from time to time.)

Even in private practice where we often have to grin and bear with patients as they represent income we need to have standards particularly to such hurtful and offensive issues!

 

Jo jo

I would not stand for it, have word with the receptionist and boss of the practice.

Good luck with the small minded.

 

Jo Jo

I have a friend named Sally (for the sake of anonymity), She is African and in her forties and after being rescued from a dump where she was left abandoned as a premature baby she grew up in a jungle village. She was passed around to different families and brought up by anyone who would take her on as unpaid help i.e. a slave. She got her bare necessities but almost no love or affection. Because of her station in that society she was regularly beaten and abused by children and adults. She became numb to the beating and wonders now how she didn't die from some of them and how often she felt no pain. She now know and came to know from an early age, though she is not sure how, that God was looking after her. The beatings, which included stabbing left physical marks to this day, but no brain injury. Daily she would walk 20miles to school and back on almost no food save maize cakes and broth. The nearest town was 60miles walk and 40miles to the nearest road. This is when she could walk because at about 9 she got rheumatic fever, which seriously affected her heart, but only physically, She has a huge heart of God.
She would dream as a young girl of emmigrating, although in her mind she only knew she would go somewhere else since she knew nothing of the world outside here locality.
She did come to England about 25 years ago I think, she is very black. She is now well educated and speaks eloquently. Over the last few years she has had major heart surgery several times that didn't go well and sits on the edge of death, because synthetic heart valves didn't stay in place properly but cannot be redone again for medical reasons. We pray for a new heart for her on many occasions.
She is almost house bound because physical activity that would increase her heart rat beyond 60bpm might kill her, so she lives on beta blockers that subdue her energy also.
I have never heard her complain or blame anyone, she thanks God that he brought her out of the jungle to England, she thanks God that her weakness gives her the opportunity for great faith. In her weakness she is extremely strong, she endures with a happy and faithful spirit all that God has graciously allowed her to be tested with.
Two years ago, before the heart valve came unstuck, she embarked on a project to bring to young girls out of her African village community, their mother had died and she could envisage for them a life like she had endured as a youngster. She went for adoption and had to fight vigorously thru the African court system to secure the girls emigration. It took a lot, about a year of broken promises and let down, but her faith knew that God would bring them here and He did.

Sally loves life, she loves all people, she is an amazing woman who could have become bitter and estranged from society and those people who beat her and abused her but chose not too, she chose to forgive and love. She could have become a young street criminal, how else would she survive, but she chose not too. She chose God, she chose good life and she chooses to continue to enjoy life and people despite the fact that it might all end at any time. But Sally knows that God has plans for her and anyone can go at any time and life could be unendurable if she choose for it to be but she does not focus on that sally focuses on loving and forgiving people and praising God.

What an amazing woman, could you be an amazing woman, you are an amazing woman in the sight of God, He loves you dearly. Love and forgive for your own sake. God does that every day but he also rebukes and it is also ok for you to rebuke for to rebuke in love and forgiveness is love itself since that person rebuked has a chance to change and should thank you for that..

Why did I write this I felt the Holy spirit guided me to give you this message

Bless you and regards Dave Smith

 

Hi Jo jo,

I agree with Mike. Have a quiet word with the receptionist. Advise them on how to politely, yet assertively, inform pts that racism, or any other prejudices will not be tolerated. Assuming they do not hold a bigoted view, they just may have been laughing in embarrassment (I`ve seen this many times) as they were caught in a situation that they did not know how to effectively handle.

Nip it in the bud, don`t tolerate this.

Cheers,
Bel

 

Here's how to handle this situation:

When a comment such as this made, then look the person directly in the eyes with a stern look and say, "Those types of racist comments are not welcome or appreciated in this practice."

Someone needs to stand up to these people and these things need to be said so others know where you stand on the subject. If you won't say it, then who will?

 

This thread reminds me of the Martin Niemöller poem....

One of the most powerfull peices of writing Ive ever read.

 

Hi Jojo

Just one thing more, and I know it's easy to say, but don't take it to heart. There are, and always will be racists, ageists, fatists, etc. etc.

I was listening to a Liverpudlian on the local radio recently. He said that years ago he had been to see Bernard Manning at his Manchester club. The usual black, sexist and mother-in-law jokes were trotted out but then the Liverpudlians were treated so savagely that the chap said that he wished he was a black, female mother-in-law instead!

Fortunately, we, the Anzacs and the rest of the Commonwealth took arms against fascism (as did the USA later) to prevent the situation that Mike eloquently detailed. It really isn't so bad here, so confront the offenders and I guarantee you'll receive an apology.

All the best

Bill

PS My father fought in the Indian Army with Sikhs, what are now Pakistanis, and Gurkhas amongst others, against Japanese fascists. He held his fellow soldiers in the highest regard.

 

Bill,

Sikhism is a religion not a nationality or racial group.

So before 1948 they were Indian nationality and racial group.

After 1948 they were West Pakistani's, now Pakistani's after East Pakistan became Bangladesh nationality, and Indian racial group.

It gets real complicated working out what somebody is.

What am I

Mother Scottish born in edinburgh

Father Scottish born in great yarmouth

I was born in Nairobi Kenya

Brought up in hong kong for 20 years

went to school in england 10 years to 17 years.

Havent lived in scotland since 1977 when moved to england and been here since except for a recent 4 years in Aus.

So i have no idea who and or what i am.:empathy:

So when it comes to racism it is only on racial group, not nationality or religion.

Unfortunately Prejudice in general is the way of the weak and feeble minded.

David

 

Been there, bought the t-shirt. Born: Manama, Bahrain 1966. 3 birth certificates. 1. Bahrain Govt. 2. Overseas military 3. British consulate.
Mother & father Scousers . Raised: Aldershot, home of the British army. Always struggled with the 'Where are you from.?' Question.

Married a Barnsley lad.

People often mistakenly assume (rightly or wrongly) that skin colour will provide some clue as to our origins. I am pale to the point of being transparent. A kind of unattractive grey. My mind still disdains of people making the assumption that as I am thus I will agree with their ignorance.

My message David. You are David

For the OP. Never tolerate racism. On every level it is offensive & not acceptable. Have courage in the fact that most stand against racism. The unfortunate thing is as Bel' rightly pointed out many more will giggle & squirm in discomfort rather than openly oppose these ignorant individuals. It is in our nature to avoid confrontation.

We should make a stand against such ignorance & declare zero tolerance (as the NHS now promote in all A & E departments).

Kindest regards,

Mandy.

 

Thanku to u all! Im feeling much better about the whole issue, the issue at large and goin to work todae!

 

Hi David

Thanks for your comments. Yes, I am well aware that Sikhism is a religion and not bounded as a racial group, although as I understand it my Sikh friends tend to regard the Punjab as their 'homeland'. What I was really trying to point out is that despite the considerable prejudice exercised by 'Indians' against 'Pakistanis' and some British (certainly British Indians) against 'Indians', for racial or religious reasons, when push came to shove they all fought together against the common enemy which was defined by fascism.

By the way, I don't quite understand how your father can be Scottish if he was born in Great Yarmouth. He is actually English! Personally, I go by the rugby results.

All the best

Bill

PS Twirly. Tha's a Yorkshire woman even if not born there. So I suppose that lets thee out of

"Yorkshire born and Yorkshire bred
Thick in't arm and thick in't 'ead".

 

Hi Jojo:

First; since you "over heard" the conversation perhaps you took something out of context.

Before you get your undies in a bundies I would simple have a sit down with your secretary and let her know of your concerns.
Discuss the matter.
If it does turn out that this is what you thought it was, then I'd certainly set the record straight as far a what you think is and is not appropriate in the office.

Steve

 

Bill,

Surely if David's father is English by fortune of his place of his birth then I must be Bahraini?

I cannot possibly be a Yorkshire woman as:

a). I cannot make Yorkshire pudding. (unless Aunt Bessie provides assistance).
b). Both of my parents were from Lancashire.
c). I am neither a Dee dar (Sheffielder) or A Thee thar (Barnsleyite).
d). I needed translation for the first years of knowing 'Himself' as I knew not what a tap oil was, mushy pays, how to get ter tarn baht meetin' sum aul slapper frum Welly street or even the basics of gerrin coil in! I just smiled a lot & hoped he wasn't telling me anything sad...

In truth is our ethnicity derived from our place of birth, our parents culture or our chosen place of residence? Am intrigued. The forms provided by many large institutions request information re: Ethnic background. 1) White British. 2) White European. 3) Black. 4). Asian. 5) Mixed race. etc......

Confused, currently of Doncaster.

 

Hi Mandy

I suppose Dave's father was just lucky. You must be a Lancastrian Barhaini....

I'm sure that you're just as sweet whether you are a red rose or a white one!

All the best

Bill
:drinks

 

Bill,

my Dad's middle name is Keeley.

This means that he is a Dundee Keeley, coming form Broughty Ferry. His parents happened to be living in Gt Yarmouth when he turned up.

So that is why labels are bonkers.:deadhorse:

twirly if blonde haired blue eyed and pale complexion is a Viking.:drinks

I hate describing my self as White British. In hong kong i was labeled European which i find preferable.

Political correctness in my opinion has done more to alienate people than anything else as it has forced labels on to people.

regards david

cold tonight here in suffolk

 

Yes, that will be me. Himself has cut right back on the pillage thang but I hold out hope for the future. igs:

In future I will include 'Nordic beauty' in my description.

Ta many much.

She wot twirls.

PS. I hope trade descriptions don't intervene!

 

Hi David

I hate describing myself at all; if I do then I tend to answer Mercian (kept the Taffies out), then English (happen to be white but don't really care), then British. If I am writing to Australians, I sign myself 'Pommie Bastard Bill' because the PC brigade prevents them from using that term of 'endearment?' but I reserve the right to do so. I never describe myself as European. Someone might think that I'm a Frog - Lord forbid and break out the longbows.

I totally agree with your final sentence.

All the best

Bill

:drinks

PS If you are in Suffolk, you must be a southern poufter?

 

"I find the undertones of his comment incrediably racist. In fact this comment has made me upset all day... till now!

I felt I had no right to confront either patient or receptionist as they could be considered to be in a conversation which I was not in but I am now determined to confront any such comments coming from patients/staff if they do have a racist undertone (as they unfortunately do from time to time.)

Even in private practice where we often have to grin and bear with patients as they represent income we need to have standards particularly to such hurtful and offensive issues!"

I would not admonish the patient for his comments as that is a no-win situation and is not going to change his views. My Job is not to judge but to provide appropriate foot care.

I would have a discussion with my receptionist as my receptionist is not only my employee but a reflection of my practice. My staff may have views I do not agree with and my job is not to change their views but to not project their views in any way, shape or form to my patients. We must always be neutral and as professional as possible during office hours.

Look at Tiger Woods. He lost many endorsements due to his actions off the course. This was not a good reflection on the companies he was paid to endorse so he was let go.

In the end, we can never change people, the only people we can change is ourselves. When we change for the better, we set the example for others to follow suit.

Steven

 

No! can't agree with that statement and neither do you since you state later that you want to set a better example, which is not neutral.

Quite agree here, but by example we do have the potential to introduce someone to a different way (that we define as better) and give them choice wouldn't you agree?

Define better, what authority do you use to define what opinion or way of life is best? I'm sure that someone who wants an all white England would think that situation was 'better'.

Regards Dave

 

Quote:
We must always be neutral and as professional as possible during office hours.
No! can't agree with that statement and neither do you since you state later that you want to set a better example, which is not neutral.


By better example, I am saying that we must strive to be competent and caring docs to all people. We should not behave in any way that is destructive to humanity but that which is constructive. By being neutral, we have our own belief systems but we are not pushing them on others unless it is in respect to their medical problem. By being neutral, we strive to stay on the subject of the patient's chief complaint and the normal small topic.



Quote:
In the end, we can never change people, the only people we can change is ourselves.
Quite agree here, but by example we do have the potential to introduce someone to a different way (that we define as better) and give them choice wouldn't you agree?

We can introduce them to a different way as long as that way directly relates to the treatment of their chief complaint. It is unethical to use our position to introduce our patients to any form of thinking that is not related to their medical condition. Patients come to us for one reason, to seek help with their foot pain. Our job is to focus on that and educate them about proper foot care.


Quote:
When we change for the better, we set the example for others to follow suit.
Define better, what authority do you use to define what opinion or way of life is best? I'm sure that someone who wants an all white England would think that situation was 'better'.


When we change for the better, we are healing our past emotional wounds. We are neutralizing our trigger points. We forgive others and especially ourselves. We begin to embrace and accept ourselves as we continually raise and expand our consciousness.

In our higher state of awareness we want what is good and constructive for people of all races and all beliefs for we cherish the diversity and know that we are all part of the Oneness of the universe.

Steven