Husband Store (joke for the weekend)

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A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs.

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

"That's nice", she thinks, "but I want more."

So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.

"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.

"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

 

Ah Craig,

Possibly true but.......... most men are of the belief that women can neither follow directions or measure properly. This being the case I wonder how many women ended up in the basement??

Reason women can't measure properly ........... because all their adult life theyre led to believe |-----------------| is equal to ten inches

PS. The women on floors 1 & 2 (mens shopping section) were liars.

 

It's not?!?!

As long as we're on gender jokes...

God is speaking to adam in eden. He says
"i've decide to make you a companion to share lifes joys and trials. It will be called a "woman". I'm planning to iron out all the kinks in this design with this one and make it perfect. She will be beautiful, intelligent, witty and suave. She will be more resiliant than you, cope better with being ill, be able to create other, small humans inside of her and give birth to them without complaint or fuss. She will be delighted to cook for you, clean for you and attend to your every whim and she will ENJOY doing those things for you because i will make her fall in love with you with such selfless devotion and be so secure in her position even though she will be your superior in every way. She will be you companion, and your helper in all things.

Adam replies
"that sounds brilliant big G, what do you need from me"

God
"a few minor bits. One kidney, one lung, one leg, three fingers off your left hand, all your hair and toenails, your spleen, one testicle and one eye. Nothing you'd miss"

Adam thinks for a while....










































"What could you make me with one rib?"

You know we love you
Regards
Robert

 

[QUOTE= Robert (the cad)

Adam replies
"that sounds brilliant big G, what do you need from me"

God
"a few minor bits. One kidney, one lung, one leg, three fingers off your left hand, all your hair and toenails, your spleen, one testicle and one eye. Nothing you'd miss" End Quote.

Robert, How did you know my husband walks with a limp, has only one testicle, one kidney, 7 fingers is bald, suffers from anychia, wears an eye patch & is prone to infection?



I guess that makes me perfick

Thought for the day: boys smell.

 

Boy you can pick 'em! I can see the attraction

Picture for the thought for the day


Regards
Robert. The cad.

 

Robert (t'cad)


I now know exactly which boys my mother warned me against!

For your information my beloved & I met in a crowded room & our destiny was decreed by the faint whiff of tea tree oil & lavender................

He has a corn you know!!!!

How that man has suffered (n to save ya time yes he still does)

Consider me slighted & cut t' (yorkshire tha nos) core........................

Hmph muchly...................