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Things you never want to hear from podiatry patients

Discussion in 'Podiatry Trivia' started by Robertisaacs, Aug 29, 2007.

Tags:
  1. footsiegirl

    footsiegirl Active Member

    'I applied a corn plaster but it hasnt helped and it has taken off the surrounding skin'
     
  2. Lizzy1so

    Lizzy1so Active Member

    "my toe was a bit sore so my sisters neighbours, gardeners, mother who was a nurse during the war had a look at it for me and she said/did ..........." or words along those lines
     
  3. twirly

    twirly Well-Known Member

    Ah Lizzy,

    My mother in law is a retired nurse.

    The fount of all knowledge. ;)

    Lots of :D & bear it.......................................
     
  4. footsiegirl

    footsiegirl Active Member

    Indeed!
    Erm, whats wrong with that? :dizzy:
     
  5. David Widdowson

    David Widdowson Active Member

    Home visit to new patient.
    Arrive, ring door bell.
    Hear indecipherable voice from indoors.
    Eventually open letter box to hear elderly lady say "Put your hand through the cat flap and pick up key and come in"
    Unlock door.
    I see cluttered hall way and open kitchen door.
    Intrepid practitioner steps forward.
    Looks left into kitchen to see 90+ year old lady clinging to fridge who says "I fell down two days ago and hurt myself badly and I was waiting for you to arrive to do my feet then I can ring 999".
    OH SHHH1T!
     
  6. DTT

    DTT Well-Known Member

    Folowed by .... AND I am a type 1 diabetic :eek:


    Footsiegirl

    I have sat at diabetic conferences where the principal speaker was a nurse that "loved feet" and spoke the biggest load of Bollox in relation to current diabetic foot care I have ever heard !!

    I live ( in my professional life) with a "retired nurse" working for Age concern in my area that is causing untold pain and grief to the elderly coz " she is a retired nurse "and is the font of all knowledge ! irrespective of the fact she is incompetent in relation to her knowledge and Tx of footcare .

    That I think is what Twirly means

    Cheers

    D;)
     
  7. footsiegirl

    footsiegirl Active Member

    it was actually a tongue in cheek response :deadhorse:
     
  8. DTT

    DTT Well-Known Member

    Hmmm

    OK sorry I spoke

    Cheers
    D;)
     
  9. ginger

    ginger Active Member

    I have a colleague (NHS) who one day went into her room to find her patient sitting stripped completely from the waist down... we all know this happens some times so my colleague went about her business, getting the instruments out etc and was fixing the blade onto the scalpel when the patient asked in a very scared voice, "what are you going to do with THAT?!!!!!". My colleague explained to the patient, very patiently, that she was going to use the scalpel to remove the hard skin from her feet. The woman then replied "Is this the Chiropdist? I thought I was at the Gynecologist!"
     
  10. philmyfeet

    philmyfeet Member

    I had this one from a patient the other day.

    "Can you sort my feet out, they make my shoes look lumpy"
     
  11. ginger

    ginger Active Member

    Oops to my above spelling^!!! Hand typing ahead of the brain!
     
  12. That's actually a new one on me. Thought I'd heard em all!
     
  13. Joana Silva

    Joana Silva Active Member

    :D Very good thread!!!

    One of my favourites is:

    Me - " What medication are you doing now?"
    Patient - "I'm doing 3 kind os pills, one white, one pink and another blue"

    Great!!!!

    Me: "are you diabetic?"
    Patient: "just a little" ----- WHAT?


    But the most recent was:

    "Dr. I'm doing phisiotherapy... and she does this in my leg (and show me just as the phisiotherapy does it - a massage in her Aquiles tendon)... this does not cause cancer, does it?"

    Cheers :drinks
     
  14. philmyfeet

    philmyfeet Member

    I also get fed up of hearing the phrase "I have my mums feet". I always what to reply "Do you keep them in a box? In the freezer? Or are the still attached to the rest of her?
     
  15. petethe feet

    petethe feet Member

    My favourite is the lady who says -' these are the worst feet you have ever seen' - Me " You have only come in for an estimate havent you?"
    Noooo - I want then doing'.
    "Sorry but I have to apply to the council first for planning permission"
    What ?
    Well, I need to erect the scaffolding, wont I ?
     
  16. blinda

    blinda MVP

    Robert, it`s a new meaning to take these shoes, and make them fit...
     
  17. Lachw89

    Lachw89 Welcome New Poster

    First proper post!!!

    Best one I have heard was actually from a relative who does reflexology and Homeopathy.

    "Podiatry isn't a REAL health subject!"
     
  18. SarahR

    SarahR Active Member

    When I tell people what I do, I get a lot of "I used to do that", (shoe maker/Pedorthist, and another guy who has a PSW and reflexology who soaked feet and cut nails) or "my sister in-law (insert brother, cousin blablabla) does that too" (nurse, Pedorthist, PSW, esthetician etc) and some allege they do it better than my profession. Hello I'm right here listening to you and you're insulting my profession in favour your brother's practically MAIL ORDER certificate. sure.
    S
     
  19. Lachw89

    Lachw89 Welcome New Poster

    Hey hey!!! I hear some of those internet courses often require you to do up to an hour of study in order to pass them, not to mention that you require both a pulse and an IQ greater than your shoe size..... Lets not pay out these peoples credentials!! :p
     
  20. Singapore

    Singapore Welcome New Poster

    True story as a young grad to elderly man.
    "How are you today?"
    "Well my balls are really aching" !!!
    Took me five seconds to wipe the shocked look off my face and realise he was talking about his feet!
     
  21. Andrew Ayres

    Andrew Ayres Active Member

    Random person: What are you studying at uni?
    Me: Podiatry
    Random person (puzzled look): Er whats that?
    or
    Random person: So which is the best protein shake?
    After hearing this it took me a while to work out that they missed the Po and only heard Diatry
     
  22. A sentence any woman can use when their husband goes for a nocturnal wee and the sound changes from tinkle to patter.
     
  23. 1. "Are you pregnant" No, I understand that I have just got married, and you want to get the scoop before the other patients do, but i just had a big lunch.
    2. "Oh, you're not busy today?" Actually I am, I'm just running on time unlike most of your other health professionals
    3. In response to a question about medical history: "No, no problems, I'm very healthy" then when asked what medications they take: "Oh, I can't remember them all.... I might have a list somewhere..."
     
  24. Jacqui Walker

    Jacqui Walker Active Member

    Gent walks in "I Have a verrucae" takes shoes and socks off.
    Me "You have a corn"
    Gent "No I have a verrucae"
    Me "No, You have a corn"
    Gent "I'm telling you young lady I have a verrucae, and I know that because MY doctor told me it was a verrucae and I think he's more qualified than you to tellme what's wrong with my foot!:boxing:
    Me "So when the Dr looked at it what did he tell you to do about it?
    Gent "Oh, he hasn't seen it":craig:
    Me "So you didn't take your shoes and socks off and show the Dr?"
    Gent "No, well I didn't need to did I, I just told him I had a lump on my foot and he knows what he's talking about doesn't he, he's been a Dr for a long time now!":bang:
    Me "Well if you don't mind I'm either going to treat this corn as I would normally treat a corn, or you can go back to your Dr and get him to treat your verruca!":mad:
     
  25. dsfeet

    dsfeet Active Member

    and the sad thing about that , Jacki , is even if the dr did look at the foot , and the corn was large, he, the patient was probably still told it was a verracae!
    least these days they are not burning out large corns that they say are verracae , leaving scar tissue for a fibrous corn to eventuate and never be comfortable, hate to say how many cases of this i saw in practice 20+ years ago, nearly always 2nd mpj.
     
  26. Nice one.

    You knew it was going wrong when he started calling you "young lady". Next time someone does that, call them "old man" and see how much they like it. Or ask him if he tells his dentist what's wrong with him as well.
     
  27. Jacqui Walker

    Jacqui Walker Active Member

    As i'm 50 next year, I let those who are a decade or so older get away with it now, 20 to 30 years ago it would have been handbags at dawn!:D
     
  28. Jacqui Walker

    Jacqui Walker Active Member

    I have actually had a new patient who 'had a lump on the bottom of her foot' that the Dr had anaesthetised to 'cut it out' and because it had grown back had suggested they biopsy it to find out what it possible could be. IT'S A CORN!:bang: (and not a very big one at that) But I've had it for so long dear, surely it's more than that? :craig:
    Post enucleation - "Well do you know dear, it doesn't hurt when I stand now!" :rolleyes:
     
  29. Rosemary C

    Rosemary C Welcome New Poster

    :good:

    Needed a laugh. haven't looked in on the arena for a while.
    Enjoyed the postings. Think you all have covered everything.
    Rosemary C
     
  30. lmgstar3

    lmgstar3 Welcome New Poster

    haha great thread, always have the footwear debate with some of my patients...

    1) 'do you do fingernails as well?'

    2) 'can i go on my marathon run this weekend?' (after being diagnosed of sesamoiditis)

    3) 'it's not the shoes they are very comfortable and expensive.'
     
  31. Jacqui Walker

    Jacqui Walker Active Member

    During intital appointment taking patients medical history
    "Have you had any major surgery?"
    "No, as I said I'm normally very well"
    "Are you on any medication?"
    "Ehm, can't remember them now, but not very important stuff."
    Patient sits on couch, pulls trousers up towards knees. Scar running up leg.
    "So what's this about then?"
    "Oh, that's where they took the 'things' from my leg for my heart operation" AAAAAGGGHHHHHH :craig:
     
  32. Gracie

    Gracie Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients


    I've also had this problem - while I was getting a back massage!!! The masseur started waving their feet under the couch face-hole so I could get a look at them. Needless to say, it wasn't very relaxing and I don't fancy going back :wacko:
     
  33. Gracie

    Gracie Member

    I've had this sort of thing too. One lady wanted me to "grind down" her perfectly normal nails because they "deform the line of the shoe"...
    There is nothing wrong with your nails - it's your shoes that is too small and that's your TOE that is causing the bump to form in the leather.
    "Young lady, I know it's my nail, and there is nothing whatsoever wrong with my shoes"
    *sigh*
     
  34. Mr C.W.Kerans

    Mr C.W.Kerans Active Member

    Man calls; "the corn is back and giving me trouble". Next available appointment given for p.m. the following day. Man with corn; "well, if thats the best you can do." Man asked when he was last seen - "a couple of weeks ago"; man was actually last seen 7 months previously !
     
  35. Had a patient today ask me what the best painkillers were to take after nail surgery.

    Told him I was usually ok, but if doing it made my wrists sore I generally went for a couple of paracetamol when I was finished.

    Apparently that was not what he meant ;)
     
  36. Boots n all

    Boots n all Well-Known Member

    Diabetic client came late yesterday.

    These shoes you sold me last week dont fit on my left foot any more you did a crap job!

    l removed the shoe from the clients foot, removed the sock from his foot checked the foot, no marks of any kind, put the sock back on, check inside the shoe, oh there you go.

    "l see your keeping a spare pair of socks in your shoe:wacko:, not a good idea sir"
     
  37. Orthican

    Orthican Active Member

    True one:
    "Yeah they sent me here so you could help me with that hole under my toe I suppose. I don't know what all the fuss is about because it doesn't hurt"

    Same patient at a follow up:
    "These shoes feel great"
     
  38. Orthican

    Orthican Active Member

    I fit a lumbar support on a fellow and he asked me if it will help him with intimate relations with his wife.

    I had a woman say that my orthoses in her shoes stopped her "period". I told her I suspected her husband was likely responsible.
     
  39. markjohconley

    markjohconley Well-Known Member

    "Woops!"
     
  40. Gracie

    Gracie Member

    Or "Why do you have to have a degree to cut toenails? You could learn that in a week!"

    Ummm, do you really want someone who doesn't know what they're doing working with your feet?
     
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